Today I treated myself to North Face socks, super expensive
even after the outlet discount and a sale discount on top of that. They ran at $4. a pair. But they don’t bunch at the toes!
I saw Dr. Fang stepping onto the steps for sun and
air. He was not his happy funny self
this morning. He looked wiped out. He sat and curled his head, trying to shake
stuff off. It was so unlike him, to be
in this state. He looked grey and burnt
brown. Upon seeing him, I recalled how
my chest was having difficulty in breathing for two hour prior to shopping at
North Face. I felt a suffocating pain
and grief. It went away with the
distraction of shopping, saved by shopping?
After being debriefed of the drama, I decided I wasn’t going to enter
the building and go home instead, however a bloody finger Laura interrupted
this plan. I had to go in to find medicine and
bandage for her.
Upon entering the
building, everyone looked so serious, uptight and unhappy like they just had a war
in the space. I didn’t know what was in
the building, I was in pursuit of locating first aid to stop Laura’s
bleeding.
Upon entering the hall, I saw her, she who has given me so much hell and I didn’t drop dead at the sight. I actually was able to breathe normally and my feet kept on walking. I couldn’t believe it at all, I guess this means graduation of sorts.
Upon entering the hall, I saw her, she who has given me so much hell and I didn’t drop dead at the sight. I actually was able to breathe normally and my feet kept on walking. I couldn’t believe it at all, I guess this means graduation of sorts.
I am glad I missed the unnecessary war. I am glad it wasn’t me who had to bleed physically or spiritually. It is all unnecessary to experience it that
way.
Toure sat outside in the sun and was laughing all by
himself. It was not a joyful laugh, a
true laugh, it was laughter to disguise pain.
He looked really depressed and in grief.
He looked drugged out. I brought
him OJ and sat in the sun with him. He
was totally off and he was totally transmedium.
He was a bit scary to be around.
It is evident he is clear of what is wrong and is going against his own
wisdom and better judgment ignoring the screams of pain, sacrificing the bright
light of his heart for a different kind.
He is his own person and needs to live his own life.
We decided to go for a walk and came across John who came
to deliver Toure’s phone who evidently left it on the front steps. We decided to go to Teance. I think the purpose of this trip is to come
across Maryann who just returned from Ohio after the passing of her father and
friend. I honestly didn’t recognize
her. She looked horrible, all grey of
grief and purple of bruises. She began
walking my way and decided to not come across me and then did a U-turn. She felt over whelmed. Finally after sitting across from me for the
afternoon, she picked up the courage to try again and walked over. I got off my seat and gave her a hug to
receive her. We chatted and updated each
other of the past few years. Just in
talking to her, I watched her purple grey colors change and her light was back,
that was all I wanted to see happen. I
did my job for the day. This trip to
Teance was not in vain, mission accomplished.
My back was in so much pain, I had to sit on the bench,
then I just decided to go to the back and hang out instead. Michelle asked me the specifics of the pain I
was in, “Tingle, spikes, burn
etc..” She asked questions like her
brother Dr. Michael the chiropractor.
I came home and accessed today’s time at the
monastery. The monastery is a great
school of learning. Not all lessons are
sweet and warm. Not all lessons are in
beautiful sight.
