Happy Monk Bowing Away

Walked around the outskirts of the monastery and did the tourist shopping thing. A common site is one of a Tibetan mother carrying a baby child on her back begging for money. I handed her candy. I walked around and ended up at a park facing the monastery while I waited for the rest of my group to show up to head back to Lhasa.

As I hung out at the park I saw a young male monk sincerely bowing. I wanted to make an offering to support his practice. I knew he needed water in a hot day like this. But I only had candy on me. I decided to sneak up quietly to place my offering next to his shoes without disturbing him, he turned to smile at me in gratitude. I saw his young face. He was happy person who had a beautiful clean face. What a sight, a happy monk, happily practicing. That was so nice to see.

Three Tibetan Female Elders

I felt better and rested. This was our last official day together as a group. I wondered when we would all come together again. What are the chances of us getting together like this here? Of all the people in the world, we got into a group here in Tibet at this time. I started to get sentimental for some reason.

We were dropped of at Tashi Rombusi a monastery. It is one of the larger ones in Tibet. I decided to go in while the rest of the group decided they would just walk and shop. As I walked, I heard prayers, recitations coming from the buildings. It was nice to see people practicing as monks. It was lunch time and the monastery shuts down for lunch. All tourists are asked to leave the monastery. Some monks eat in some eat out at the local vendors right outside the monastery.

I followed to the crowd to exit. I ended up following three Tibetan elder women. As we approached the exit, they called me over with their hands to sit by them. I asked if I can photograph them and they declined by pointing to their bad teeth. They were very beautiful and full of grace to me. They had me sit by them to keep me company thinking I was alone waiting for other fellow travelers in my group to catch up. They didn’t understand that I was alone. One of them recited for me as she spun her hand held prayer wheel. All three of the women were reciting at this time. I felt a release in my front of my belly. I realized it was my third chakra out of balance. It was my female energy that was in need of a tune up. I didn’t know that I had a discomfort until the absence of it. Interesting huh! I recognized the strength in these elder women who barely had any teeth left and was barely still walking in their old age. I put my palms together and thanked them for giving me a healing without requesting for one.

They showed me they had bad eyes, they were discolored, they were old and well worn. I did a transference wishing their eyes were clear and wished for their wisdom eye to be wide open for them.

One of them wanted to know where my recitation beads were. I had to showed it to them. They checked it out and nodded their head of approval. Then they finally figured out I was alone we all proceeded to continue to exit the gates. I snuck a photo of their back because I really wanted a photo of them but their declined the frontal part of their body from photography but the back wasn’t discussed. And yes they knew I snuck a photo of them. These people didn’t make it to their old age by being dumb.

Our Complex Regard For Our Parents

Last night I was so tired from oxygen deprivation and rest I went to bed at 6:30pm and stayed in bed till 10am the next day. They all partied till 12pm that night and drank beer. I could hear them but I didn't join. There was a mirror outside my window and everyone checked themselves out whenever they passed by. It was fun to see from my side through the windows. We ended up getting ourselves going around 11am, and we headed for Xi’gze Farmer Guest house. We like the Chef there and the 25y a bed per night.

On the drive I realized my chest congestion and pain had to do with my relationship with my parents. It was about the complex emotions related to how I saw them and how I saw myself in our relationship with each other. It involved sadness, dedication, love, gratitude, regrets, etc…. I also noticed that it was our similar regard for our parents that brought all of us together in this car. This was our affinity. We all had this in common.

Rupert had asthma as a child and his father refused to stop smoking in his presence. His father’s health was ailing and had multiple surgeries but he refused to help himself in anyway to heal but continues to go against the doctors orders. His father did not change for himself and also not for Rupert. Rupert shared this very private and story with lots of humor but there was so much pain, sadness, loneliness, frustration and love behind it all.

I had stuffed vegetable buns called momo. I didn't know it was stuffed with curry. I just wanted ginger for my lungs to clear it. I mistaken the green pieces of onion as chile, it was green onion. I didn't have any actual pieces but the juice was strong and I knew it would bring trouble to my body. During dinner I really didn’t have the energy to carry out conversations. I must have seem very not with it and anti-social. Afterwards we ended up watching more TV. We saw badminton competition and we also saw more Family Guy and Wedding Crashers. We slept in the same room as before in the same beds.

Everest Base Camp Buggy Ride

Last night I went to bed with two layers beneath me and five layers on top of me. It took me awhile to warm up the bed with my body heat. I attempted to sleep with a massive headache. I couldn’t sleep because I was in so much pain. I had to lean on my right side to relief some of the pressure. My fourth chakra in the front was in pain also.

In the morning, our water in the cup that was left out last night froze during the night. It was -12 degrees. Our young Tibetan host decided to smoke us out by smoking the burner and then opening the door wide open. We were all cold and we decided to get packed to leave. I didn’t have to pack because I didn’t unpack.

She nagged some more in Chinese how we give her trouble by giving her work. She barely spoke Chinese whenever there was any confrontation. She would all of a sudden loose her ability to communicate and be lost in translation. But whenever she needed to complain and just trash people she would all of a sudden be very fluent in Chinese again

I couldn't wait to get away from her. I just wanted to scream and cry. She was driving me crazy. Everybody just felt she was delightful and sensed she had a bit of attitude and kept wanting me to like her and would frown at me for being uncooperative. I want to like her. She made it very difficult. In fact she was scary to me with her switching of poor me to westerners and then to playing the nasty mean person.

For breakfast Stef and Nate left for another tent that actually was warm and served food and hot water. I didn’t join because I couldn’t handle the smell of Yak butter and meat etc. Rupert, who didn’t sleep at all because he was too cold last night decided that we could pair up and that we would head down to Rombu Monastery where our driver was waiting for us. Rupert and I started to walk, a Tibetan horse buggy rider came to get us for business. We had another Tibetan translate to him that we were not interested. As we walked he kept walking and came with his horse and buggy. He asked in Chinese, "how much" Rupert said 5y per person and 10 for both of us. He agreed we hopped on. It turned out to be a rough ride. It really hurt my back and gave me whiplash. We both squatted and didn’t even sit because it was such a rough ride. My legs were a bit numb and I think I may have pinched a nerve on my back on that buggy. We got off part way because we were in so much pain and didn’t even want to be on the buggy in the first place. As Rupert handed him money, he yelled at us and demanded 60y. I started walking, I was too tired to reason or even deal with it.. He kept yelling violently and we kept walking.

We made it to the Rombu monastery restaurant. I couldn't handle anymore smell of meat, smoke, yak butter. Who in their right mind smokes in this altitude? I sat outside in the car and meditated. I recited, and it never fails, I always feel better after I recite and meditate. What a priceless treasure, meditation and the rest of Buddhist practices.

My massive headache returned and my back was burning from the buggy ride injury. We passed the summit again and once again got to see the magnificent peaks of Everest, Choya, Mogoru. As we passed the summit, the clouds were moving in and started to cover parts of the peak. We really lucked out on weather. We headed for Sa’gya for food. I had a terrible headache and chest congestion. We sat to eat and I couldn't eat the noodles that didn't have garlic in it but had garlic oil in it. Somehow it was giving me fevers and made me tremble here in Tibet. Nate helped me finish my food. During dinner, Stef really wanted to stay at the Guest House, she had her romantic notion of it. Really, the rest of us didn't care. I just didn't have any energy to keep up with her ungrounded energy that came out of her tongue and how she needed all of us to agree with her how her ideas are most perfect and thoughtful and well thought out for all of us. I did snap at her to stop her. I couldn't take it anymore and a room all to myself for 50y a night.

Everest Base Camp

I woke up middle of the night with a massive headache. I think the lack of oxygen in this elevation is the cause.

I got very little rest. I think many brain cells died. I think I got dumber than before. I think I should retire from any work force activity. Too many brain cells died. I got up for Sunrise in the cold and then went back to bed like everyone else in my group. As it turned out, our room had the view of Everest peak and all we had to do was pull the curtain. This was discovered after we all froze our bums off in the cold outside to watch the golden sunrise. Stef gave me medicine. I took it, it was only good for 90 minutes. We started our hike up Everest Camp after lunch around 12:30pm. The hike was nice. I had to stop often to take lots of deep breathes. The hike usually takes 2 hours, it took me 3 and half hours. It was nice my group waited for me and we had tea. I walked with my splitting head ache. It was horrible. I felt like there were many thousands of drones pounding in my head. We passed by Blue Sheep. They look like deer but different. We went off road and did other trails too to cut short on the switch backs. We arrived in Everest Base Camp at 4pm. The river was partly frozen. The wind was picking up and it was bone chilling cold. Nate picked out a tent for us to stay in. I was concerned about staying warm for the night because I was shivering from the cold and could not warm up at all.

This tent was run by a 15 year old Tibetan girl. She said the tents were scheduled to come down 10 days from now but due to the weather it has been changed to tomorrow. She also said that it rained this week and we come across good weather. We were all glad the conditions were working for us. Her family had left already.

This Tibetan young girl was pulling on our sympathy strings when she told us that she wanted to be a Tibetan nun and go through the border of Nepal to be with her Spiritual Leader in India. She said many things against the idea of living for money etc..... She said that it costs 1,000 yuan to cross the Nepalese boarder, and it takes 4,500 yuan to do round trip. That her father has checked out this line and each person in their family is saving to make the crossing. We all went for it to go along with our romantic notions of Tibet and the current state of its people.

She then told us that the 40y per bed didn't go to her but to the government and only food ordered through her goes to her. I went to the kitchen to see what I can cook because I missed my own cooking. As it turns out she had instant noodles, potatos, rice, and eggs. What were we suppose to order from the menu when she didn't have ingredients for the menu? It didn’t matter she just wanted money from us. I asked for the light to be turned on and she refused unless we ordered something to eat. We also brought two friends we met on the road in for food and to hang out. They all ordered egg fried rice. I had seen the old egg fried rice on the floor from days before. I told her she could not serve old rice and needed to cook new ones. She didn't and people ate crunchy old egg fried rice. I confronted her and she flinched a little. I said you can make people sick this way. You promised to serve new fresh food. She tried to wiggle by saying Tibetans do things this way. I reminded her that was not what we agreed on. She got nervous and tried to make up for it by offering the two trekkers blankets to use for the night free. With that gesture I felt there was hope in her. But then she kept coming to me to sell trinkets. She wanted to know what we would order for breakfast. The hot water she poured for us were cloudy and barely warm. She did not keep the fire going like other tents did. She had quite an attitude and what made her happy was money. It was contradictory to her heart plucking story of her aspiration and how she's not about money.

We went to the Tibetan end of the season party. When I entered an man half serious half joking asked for our money to be at the party. Since I understood and no one else did, I left the party. I left because I was tired. I left because I knew they wanted our money. I left because they’d serve alcohol and eat raw meat to celebrate the season. I left because I wanted to enjoy some quiet and alone time in this week of being together twenty-four-seven.

Summit View of Everest Peak

We decided the weather was actually nice and we wanted to get to Everest on good weather. After getting our permits, our driver aimed for us to watch the sunset on a high summit to view Everest given the clear sky holds up. We had heard of rain and cloud the day before and did we luck out. Lang said off the years he has been in this business, he’s only had a few days as beautiful as this on viewing Everest. On the summit we had gone up in elevation and the wind picked up. I was not prepared for it. I had clothes but didn't put them on. I just jumped out of the car to snap photos. It was cold.

We decided we wanted to watch sunrise of Everest peak so we headed to Rombu monastery the last stop where all vehicles have to stop before base camp. We ended up paying 80y per bed at the monastery because it was so late by the time we got there all the 40y beds were taken and the price goes up as the night grows. We slept and alarmed ourselves to get up to watch sunrise. At this high of place, the stars filled the sky. I have never seen so many stars in the sky before and the Milkyway was clear and wide and long. It was cold here. I had me blankets on.

The guest reception saw my brand new boots and wanted to buy them from me for 30y. I got them for 60y. I told him I need them to walk in, I haven't worn them yet. He said he'd be back in the morning for my boots. I was afraid they'd be gone in the morning somehow and contemplated sleeping with them on.

Drivers lodging was a tent in the parking lot. It was cold for Lang but he toughed it and said it was his job and this is what he goes through when he comes here.

At the Mercy of a Bad Driver

After all that, our driver who had it rough but had professional work ethic would drive us all the way to Rombu monastery where it is 8kil away from Everest Camp if we so wanted and we did because the weather was good and we weren’t sure if it would last.

As our vehicle started to work properly two young female European hitch hikers wanted to hitch hike with us. They came all the way here and refuses to pay for the public bus fare or shared hired trekking vehicle price. It didn’t make sense to any of us on the car. They begged us and we decided if they were to come on they would have to pay. They didn’t want to and continued to hitch hike. What a dangerous thing to do in the wilderness of Tibet where if you disappear, no one could track you down easily or even notice.

We stopped at Sa’gya for dinner. At this Tibetan Guest house, we met 4 foreigners from Germany. They were unhappy with their driver. They prepaid for accommodation and everything in a package, bad idea. They were stuck with whatever they were given and had no choice. The problem was they really didn’t know what they were agreeing to when they made the agreements on the contract. On top of that, their driver kept talking us into staying there and not proceeding onward with our itinerary. I didn't like the look of the driver and told our group not to listen to him. As it turns out after dinner, his group complained to us about their bad driver who changed their itinerary and schedule and did whatever he wanted instead. He had the car and he was in power and they were stuck because they paid the money already. He did not go where the contracted agreed to and x-ed off days and places on his own. They sat around a lot. They paid for first class lodging and didn’t even get hot water, they got terrible dorm rooms. Boy, were we glad we didn't get him. I heard such things can be common. We all walked out of there in so much more appreciation for our driver and for each other.

Pull Over, Road Construction

Then we headed off for Everest Camp after gigantic breakfasts. I have learned that if I ate a lot in one meal, it usually means I won’t be able to eat the next meal because I won’t have access to food. After breakfast, Stef and I decided to clean up the old school style with a pan and lots of hot water. It was so refreshing. I am so grateful for access to hot water to drink, for food, and to wash up.

We were suppose to leave at 7:30am but we didn’t leave till two hours later. Our driver complained to us about being behind schedule. The road trip has turned out to be a beautiful one. We passed by gorgeous sceneries. We stopped by a frozen river and took pictures of yaks and mountain goats. Seeing all the animals at the farm and on the road reminded me how sad it is to be an animal. In the Bay Area, it’s not too bad to be a pet animal. Sometimes pets get better treatment and care than humans. But here, the animals do not have such luxury. They have it rough in work and weather conditions. They barely get enough to eat, care, and they will all lead to a human meal or death at work. It was sad for me to see this.

On route, there was road construction, the road was getting paved. We waited for about an hour and half parked along with rest of the traffic of tourist buses, local public buses, and trekking 4X4s like us. During this time, Rupert pulled out his "The Family Guy' again. Then the driver decided he was going to uses his 4 wheel drive and go off road towards the riverside because the mountain side was too pebbly to pass around the construction. He said it would take all day just to do 1/4 mile on the road and it would take all day before they clock off.

We were the frontiers who lead the way of paving a new way but then our car got stuck on a river rock. The muffler pipe was caught. We had to wait for another car to tow us out. They couldn't tie the chain to the right part of the car because it was caught in the bank. Somehow someone decided to chain it to the front axle. We all held our breath because that's got to bring problems later. Well, it did. The car could not get out of gear shift. It was stuck on one gear. So we had to park the car aside while the driver along with others who drove by stopped to lend a hand and equipment. The whole thing took 5 hours by the river. I really enjoyed watching how people helped each other out from this experience that was so very nice to see. We did loose 5-6 hours but it depends on how you look at it. We were now including morning delays seven hours behind schedule. It was a good thing we all had an enormous breakfast.

Nepalese Chef at Our Request

We stayed in Xigaze the first night instead of Gyangze by the recommendation of our driver which is different than our planned itinerary. He took us to his friend’s guest house called Tibet Farmers Guest House. The lodging was 25 yuan a bed negotiated by our driver. They told us they gave us a discount because they are friend with our driver. There was a room with four single beds and we went for it. Lang was nice to let us choose and decide. He let us know that if we didn’t like what we saw then we would drive us around until we were satisfied and happy with our lodging.

There was hot water for shower but we were all too cold to bother with it. It would involve walking across the courtyard in the cold afterwards. There was no light in the toilet we had to wear our head lamps to use the rest room. Plus the restroom doors did not shut properly so someone had to watch the door for better privacy so we would make our pee breaks in pairs.

The chef in the Tibetan Farmer Guest House was a good chef from Nepal who loved the art of cooking and up for any challenges of making any dish you ask for. He’ll even make whatever he hasn’t made before if you’d give him the recipe.

After dinner we spotted our driver on a date at this place with one of the girls who work here. I guess this is why he was so eager to recommend this place to us. All the girls here call me sister and treat me like a queen for some reason. They say they like my face, I don’t know what that means but I had fun exchanging words with them. Lang as it turns out seem to be quite a hit among the girls wherever we go. As for a modern Tibetan man, he's actually got class and he's an honest nice guy.

Rupert brought his lap top and he played "The Family Guy" on his lap top, it was our movie time before bed. I spent the time writing in my journal.

Gyangze and the Pelche Monastery

Then we went to Gyangze one of the six Tibetan communities in Tibet aside from Lhasa. We passed by Tibetan farms where the yak roamed and lived liken to a dog at each house, except these yaks plow the field. The houses and fences were built on yak pies. Corn was hung to dry from the roof. It was all very neat to see. I think these images are western images of Tibet and not the modern tourist convenient Lhasa.

We went to visit a monastery called Pelche. I don’t believe I’ve got the proper spelling on this. There is the Chinese spelling and the Tibetan spelling on the names of places and things here. In Pelche monastery, I walked around. There were 77 alters, or halls. I honestly got sick of them. They were repetitive. I enjoyed the images of 8 great Bodhisattvas the most. I went up the Stupa that was round and each level was designed in rings and within rings, each had halls and stairs that led to up or down. But 1st floor entrance to 2nd didn't mean it led to the 3rd. So I lost track of what stair was in what floor and in what hall and got lost on the way down and ended up doing things twice or more. I kind of got dizzy afterwards too. I really felt like I could not see another monastery after this. Nate was so Tibetan monasteried out that he went shopping outside the monastery and took photos.

My insights after this monastery was,… boy am I glad Ven. Hsuan Hua set up things so our monks and nun don't have to sit at the door and collect tickets or sit at the alter and sell trinkets for a living. Glad the system works and the community is well supported. In fact, I think we've got it well and anyone who's got nothing better to do than fight should try to check out other conditions around the world.

Everything is Sacred in Tibet

We passed by a beautiful river. I am learning everything in Tibet is sacred, each river, each lake, each hill, each mountain is sacred. This river had a beautiful scenic backdrop. I was told by Lang that in this river, when Tibetans cannot afford funeral ceremony, they send their deceased down the river. So no one eats the fish because they believe the fish eat their deceased loved ones. So our driver told us, those who sell fish along the road for meals are not Tibetans and that we are not stopping for fish meals. We did pull over to walk on the sand banks off the river to enjoy the beauty.

Yamzho Yumco Lake

We went to a lake, might have been the Yamzho Yumco lake. I cannot recall exactly, it is south beyond Lhasa. It was beautiful and it was turquoise in color. I really enjoyed it. It would have been a great place to picnic but we had to hit the road. There was a man with a yak who charged tourist money to get photos taken with the yak. It only costed 10 yuan per photo. Since I wasn’t taking the picture with the yak but only of the yak, I figured that price did not apply to me. I wanted to use the toilet there but a person stood in front of the open pits and decided to charge 1.5 yuan for usage. It stank and people can see you from above. I decided to wait for another beautiful scenery where there is open flow of fresh air, complete privacy of the open space in the wilderness of Tibet. Infact this became our group agreement that the car would not stop for pee break unless the view was first class.

Lost in Translation

We set off for our trip on Saturday morning. We met at 8am to load up the car. I got to sit shotgun first. That was fine because I was very tired and since we would spend a week together we would all rotate. Our driver Lang looked decent he was in his early thirties who spoke mandarin with heavy Tibetan accent. He did not speak English and was very glad that I could communicate with him. Lang was a nice, good safe driver who has no record of accidents.

There were plenty of fun stories coming from the back row. Everyone in the car had plenty of travel experience and stories to share. They were pretty outrageous from traveling all over South America on public buses with the chickens and shotguns to breaking the back in three different places. On this trip so far I have come across people who are young and have traveled all over the world for months to a year at a time. The most I’ve traveled was two and half months in Europe on trains and ferries. All their stories and experiences seems so much more monumental than my very comfortable backpacking trip in tourist friendly Europe.

Rupert shared his story of having a sleeper berth ticket from Beijing to Xi’an but the train service person at the dock would not let him on. He had the right train, right time, right cart number but he was not allowed on. So he went back to the counter to inquire and they said he should have been let on. So he decided to take the next train figure that there would be one in a few hours. Well, that turned out to be 12+ hours of waiting. He didn’t sleep because he didn’t want to miss the train. He finally boarded the next train but it was full. He was not allowed onto the sleeper berth cart because he no longer had a ticket that was valid. He ended up as a traveler with a standing ticket. He stood the next 8+ hours to Xi’an. On the train he hung out with locals who slept in the toilet because they too had a standing ticket. He complained of the spitting and other disgusting things he saw on the train. Finally he made it to Xi’an during the National Holiday week and was just too tired and bummed out by the whole experience that he decided he didn’t like China and would try to at least make it to Tibet on the next available flight. When he left Hong Kong he left all his winter gear in his friend’s place thinking he wouldn’t go to Tibet. But he made it in and was totally unprepared for the cold etc….His story shed light on his terrible experience with the train that it was tempting to feel sorry for him but all and all it was so funny in the same time that we laughed the whole time. We encouraged him and supported him by saying that if he had not been through all of this, he wouldn’t have such an unique story to tell and the story was worth the suffering he went through.

I kept the driver company by chatting with him in Mandarin. He told me many things about the Tibetan culture and his tour guide stories. He was so happy that I could communicate with him and be a translator for the rest of the group. He said often he would give tourist instructions and make arrangement but then they would disappear. One time he told a tourist to not wonder off but he did and he got lost. It took Lang 6 hours of driving around a small old town to find him at sun down. He attributed all of this to miscommunication on both ends.

I bought lots of car snacking kind of food. No one else prepared a supply of fruits, crackers, nuts, dried fruit, and candy. There was no Seven Eleven to stop at or drive-throughs, I was very hungry and so was everyone else in the car. I decided to share, things tastes better shared anyways.

Final Group Member

I didn’t make it to Namtso Lake today. There was road closure and all the vehicles were turned away. Looks like Namtso Lake won’t be officially accessible until spring of next year.

We went to the travel agency to pay the final bill this evening. The two Chinese men who were our possible fourth and fifth person decided they didn't want to go for 6 days and just wanted 5 days so they planned to start their own group. So within half an hour we walked the streets and picked up another guy named Rupert from England who just arrived in Tibet in the afternoon. He also flew in and looked really tired. But he was up for taking off the next day with us so we found our fourth traveling companion. Rupert now works in Australian Gov. in the intelligence department.

Potola Palace

I went to Potola Palace and I saw many Tibetan pilgrims bowing outside the Palace right next to the sidewalk on the road. This is to prevent interruption of foot traffic on the sidewalks but how about the on coming vehicles zooming by the pilgrims? I stood there watching them bow and was moved to tears. I wondered who and what are they bowing to. Whatever it was, they looked very sincere.

I was instructed to show up half and hour early before my designated time. I did and I found out why. Because you have to climb slowly up many steep steps on zig zag style till you get up to the door from the gate. Within the Palace there are more steps and stairs made for one person at a time. This makes sense to have entry number control. So I was able to appreciate how they've limited the ticketing. There really isn't room for lots of people at once. All the walk ways are for one person at a time.

This place is a palace. It if filled with gold, silver, and multi colors including black. I like the fact that there things are dusty and nothing has been repainted inside. There beautiful colorful murals on the walls. I had first imagined it would be too much, too ornate for me. But somehow it all felt really cozy and just fine. I think the Potola Palace is decked out grander than the Forbidden City of Beijing. At least it hasn't been destroyed and then re-created.

There are people mopping the floor all the time. So the floor is smooth and clean. It's weird but it feels really empty and abandoned in the palace. It's as if The Dalai Lama is already dead but he is still alive. The current Dalai Lama's room where he studied and practiced while he lived here in his youth had the best energy. I heard only his teacher and personal attendant had access to this study room that is right outside of his bedroom. It was very much alive and active there. I decided to make an offering, in respect to his practice. His personal room is not open to the public. Everything is blocked off with guard rails so I had to stick my neck out long to see things.

Tibetan Pilgrims pick up money that as been offered on one alter and then re-offer them at other alters. It was interesting for me to watch. They don't have money to offer so they recycle the offering. Is it so important to offer money? I'm not quite sure why, but I found myself feeling very emotional in the Palace and facing the courtyard I cried and cried..

It was very interesting feeling hard to describe to be in this palace where many Dalai Lamas have been. They dedicated their lives to this work of benefiting others. I reminded myself to not let this life go to waste. Don’t waste any bit of it. Help and benefit everyone somehow. I don’t need to be a religious leader like the Dalai Lama or a President of country to do this. I can do my part by creating harmony and peace wherever I go and transforming habits that result in harm on others.

Sleeper Berth Train From Lanzhou to Lhasa

At the Lanzhou train station I inquired on how to go about getting a train ticket to Lhasa. People all pointed me to the ticket counter. I asked many people and in shock of how easy it is to get a ticket. I had heard how difficult it is to get into Tibet and all train tickets were sold out till next year. I guess it was inaccurate information. I went to the counter and was told the train leaves in two hours and I lucked out because the train does not run daily during the low season. I handed the clerk my money and almost had the ticket in my hand when the officer standing next to me asked for my ID. I handed him my US passport and he flagged my ticket from me. Having a foreign passport I needed a permit before I could buy a ticket. I told him I was Chinese and a voice of a young man behind me in line budding in said with unfriendly sarcastic attack, “she calls herself Chinese!” This same young man was friendly when he was in line behind me, now he appears to be foe and not a friend. It was so weird. So I patiently asked the officer how I can go about getting a permit, where is it, whom do I talk to, how do I get there, etc… I bombarded him with all these questions because I needed the answers and somehow he made a decision and reluctantly decided to asked for my Chinese name and let me have my ticket. I couldn’t believe it. Just like that. I had told myself ahead of time that if there was a train today, and I could get on it then it was meant to be for me to go to Tibet and so I will. If not then forget it. So I did.

I dropped my bags at the baggage storage and I was overwhelmed with mixed emotions on the verge of tears with my Lhasa train ticket in my hand. I had a sensation of going home after being away too long. There were tears of joy welling up and tears of grief and sadness.

I went to a market to buy things for my Tibet trip. I had read somewhere that I better bring my own food in so I bought crackers, seaweed, oatmeal, nuts, dried fruit, chocolate, fruits, and a case of bottled water. There were 15 bottles in that case. It was so heavy I had trouble carrying it.

I decided to try the very famous Lamien or Ramen, meaning hand pulled noodles. It is famous because it is said Ramen originated from Lanzhou like pizza in Naples, Italy. I ordered a bowl of ramen for two and half yuan and it was so good, that I was sad that my stomach was only able to contain one bowl and that my train leaves in an hour after 1pm and it will be my only bowl.

I sat in the waiting room for the cue to board the brand new two month old German designed train. I sat among Tibetans. They were in their traditional clothes. I befriended a Lanzhou Chinese girl who might as well have been a Tibetan because she looks more Tibetan than any Tibetan there. She was dressed as a Tibetan from head to toe. She spoke Tibetan and her Mandarin was full of Tibetan accents and grammar. She was young, beautiful, elegant, and there was a kind of grace in her speech, she looked liked a Tibetan princess to me. I couldn’t remember how to pronounce her Tibetan name. When we boarded the train her father decided he would help me carry my case of bottled water onto the train. She and all the Tibetans were in seated cart. I was in the hard sleeper berth cart. I told her I would visit her during our 27+ hour train ride..

I paid 558 yuan for my top sleeper bunk. In my compartment there was another man Hsieh and that was pretty much it. Same goes for the rest of the cart. It was spacious during low season. I moved from top bunk to middle bunk because the vent was on the top bunk and this made me cold. The attendants were like airline stewards. The entire train was brand new. I found it to be better than airplanes. Each compartment has control over the broadcasted music and can adjust the light too. The air tubes were passed out for us to use whenever we feel like we needed more oxygen.

Hsieh is in the construction business and going to Tibet upon recommendation by friends to see what opportunities are there. I learned the business of construction is where the money is at right now in China. Everywhere there is construction going on of the road or buildings.

I also bought all sorts of food in Lanzhou. People on the train laughed at me for packing all this stuff. I decided I couldn’t carry all that water and decided to share my water. The amazing part was no one wanted to take my water. I begged people to take my water but they all refused. I noticed people were not used to this at all. They were all waiting for the catch behind my giving and so they refused in fear. So then I decided I need to just drink it myself. It was a good idea because DunHuang was very dry, lacked water, and I also did sand dessert hike so I drank half of the case on the train. I definitely hydrated. If I hadn’t been illogical about buying the case of water that I couldn’t carry, I wouldn’t have thought of drinking that much water. I might be very sick upon arrival in Lhasa. So it all worked out really well.

People all frowned at my oatmeal and tell me oatmeal is for old people that I shouldn't be eating stuff like that. It doesn't matter what they think or say, I just tell them I am inexperience and dumb. They also tell me I've got too much clothes on and shouldn't of pack all these female products and medicine. That everything is very easily accessed especially with all these trains going in and out of Lhasa. I like all the products I packed and hauled from US, even if I just needed it once, it would have been worth it. I tend to get headaches when I am in switching from environments of drastic temperature variances. So I tend to like to be warmer dressed than cool. It works for me.

During the train ride, beautiful snow fell onto the ground in the QinHai region. The view was spectacular. It felt like it was computer generated for a Hollywood movie, too perfect to be true. In the vast sea of nature all around there were elements of different terrain all in one. Sand dunes and solid mountain layering each other with crystal lakes to one side, it would be snowing in an area and raining in another and cloudy over there, and sunny over here. This is all contained in one panoramic view, amazing just amazing! This view alone was worth the ride. Everyone was glued to the windows. Some people were even jumping in joy. People’s jaws were dropped in awe. I was sad when night fell and the views were inhibited, it was pitch dark and that was the end of the scenic views.

I also got to see mountain bulls, they are full of long hair. The native call them Huangneo, yellow ox, we call them yaks. Some of them are dark body with white face, almost appears as if they have masks on. They were beautiful from far away. Looking at their faces closely I saw sadness. It wasn't what I was expecting. I thought to myself how awesome you get to hang out in this beautiful land and call it home. Then I asked a local what is to become of these bulls, he said, human meat in meals. So that is why they are so sad. That's sad.

The man Yang from WuTaiShan gave me two tablespoons of tea leaves from PutuoShan. So I have been using these tea leaves very sparingly to make it stretch. Just 6 leaves for 18 oz used at least 2 seepings. It usually takes 5-10 minutes of seeping to get any flavor in this sparing ratio. I can't stand getting bad tea and then not wanting to drink it or dump it so I haven't bought any. This was good tea. The canteen I bought leaks, it's not made in Japan I was so disappointed.

I do enjoy quality things that delivers what it promises to I went to hang out with my Tibetan Princess friend in her cart. It was filled with Tibetans. She has been in Tibet for the last 6 years and has been staying with her aunt. She works in her aunt’s shop as a seamstress. She sows traditional Tibetan clothes for a living. In her compartment was an elder Tibetan woman who might as well have been Native American because she looked like one. She was beautiful especially the lines on her face on her dark sienna colored Tibetan skin. My friend translated for me. I enjoyed talking with them, sharing my crackers and pistachio nuts. Pistachio nuts are from Xinjiang, there were very delicious and fresh. They were expense and so it was very popular among my new friends. The elder handed me yak butter desserts and yak butter dough. It was very precious to her and she spared one for me. I tried a crumb and it was very flavorful, better than any buttered biscuits or desserts I’ve had. Unfortunately I couldn’t handle yak butter smell and couldn’t eat what she offered.

I befriended a Gansu girl who is Islamic in my cart. She is in the compartment next to me. She was very sweet and enjoys singing. We had some artist and song we both like and it was played over the PA we sang along in joy. She was traveling with her grandma to Tibet to visit her uncle. Her family is taking time to take her on travels before she enters college in Pakistan to study Arabic and Islam. She plans to return to her home town to teach Arabic and Islam. She hopes to be able to travel the world. I told her to get her Ph. D and she may have opportunities to travel to conferences all over the world. She told me she cannot marry a non-Islamic man by birth but an Islamic man can marry a female convert. She also cannot eat food that is not prepared by Islamic people but she was eating instant noodles made in Taiwan. I guess I don’t understand everything. Somehow her grandmother was distrusting of me and kept a tight leash on her and limited our interactions.

The man named Yan who attacked me with his comment at the ticket line was also in the same cart. He was with his wife and sister in law. I chatted with him and he seemed really friendly and not. He is from Inner Mongolia. We talked about traveling as a foursome together in Tibet. He told me he was staying with his friend now a tour guide in Tibet and it wouldn’t be a problem to add me into his group. Well, I guess he forgot to get his wife’s permission because the two women were unhappy about it. Later on his tone changed and he was afraid to talk to me and would look for sightings of his wife and her sister whenever we came into a conversation. Somehow he found out I was from Taiwan and started to go off on trashing Taiwanese people on a political note. He insisted that Taiwanese people were wasteful with their blessings with their lifestyle etc…. I don’t know what to make of this guy. He is friendly one moment and then with a blink of an eyes he is the opposite to the point that I fear for my safety.

Among the Chinese Muslims, I cannot tell them I am Buddhist, they are very protective and afraid of other religions. Among the inner Chinese who declare no religious preference I cannot tell them I am Buddhist, they are afraid of religion. Among the Buddhist I cannot tell them I am Buddhist unless I am trying to stay at the monastery and it's just too much a wide spectrum. I didn't even feel safe to sit in half lotus and when I did in the train and people all stared at me with curiosity and kept their distance as they pass by. I had to tell them I am just sitting waiting for the toilet and they relaxed. I quietly lip recited Surangama Mantra at the bus terminal in TaiYuan to kill time and people all moved away from me. So now I do my practice in bed and under cover like I am asleep. I do miss sitting meditation.